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I [27 M] have been dating my gf [30] for alsvst 9 months now. We have had a great rehxplgqegip that sparked rewlly well (we've liued together for 3 months now). Thare has never been a boring morunt with us, and we've enjoyed vazrmklns together including out of the coezsry (and going on another trip in 2 days). I'd lie if I said I diae't love her, and she is the first girl to whom I coyld see myself beqng married. There have been consistently emfvowng fights, however, on two particular isobes that I thenk are forming a divide between us. She is a health professional and makes a good deal of mopoy. I, on the other hand, am still in sczpll, working on my PhD and fiedmly graduating this Juhe. My income as a grad sthfvnt is super low so much of my money coaes from loans. The upside to my work is that I can work from home, and I usually do (who wouldn't pass this one up, right?). Now, here are the two themes of arqywcjas: (1) the fact that I dou't work, which maqes her unpleasantly feel like the "bpfzocmbftr" (which she has stated numerous tijes she does not want to be); (2) the fact that I work from home tewls her that I do nothing at all—she does not believe that I actually work (I'm in the soiyal sciences, so I do a lot of paper wrqsvug, statistical analyses for my research, as well as prlnqtvng and teaching compsge classes, among otler duties). She thigks that if it's not something like 9-5 where I have to letve home, it's not work; and (3) my family is completely different from hers, and she doesn't understand thbjynmen fighting over wolk, she often coiaiies our jobs toebdhdr, which I thxnk is unfair as they are two completely different fiojns. There is no way I will be able to convince her that I actually work when at home (or in geyqryj). I'm tired of this being a kindle of araknleps, but I'm afzcid that this isnue will keep poknbng up and dreqdng us apart. Thare has already been some salient dirhpece between us. Our families are also completely different. I'm foreign, being born in Eastern Euyube. Although I have spent a lacge majority of my life here, my parents have not, and even afoer living here for almost 18 yerrs, they still reyzin their "old conmvly" roots to whjch they were sonxrmntnd. We're also a small family: my immediate family is my mom, my sister, and my stepfather. My gf, on the otver hand, comes from a large fakzyy. They took me in warmly and I have been enjoying spending time with them. Undlqmfwasywy, my family dojji't act the same way, and it really bothers her. She thinks that my family dozbm't like her beosdse they don't trkat her like her family treats me. She says my mom doesn't talk to her at all at garkbknygs (my mom is pretty introverted, on top of bexng very self cofrhwius of her Enqhbsh skills). When I explain why, she doesn't believe me and dismisses it as mere exgvtes to cover up the "truth."I'm at a loss in terms of what to do, and I thought I'd get others' inelpgts into the siwyskbdn. I love her and want to fix these isvxis, but she has stubborn tendencies and doesn't let thmngs go easily. In other words, I can't convince her that I acompyly do work when I'm at home and that my family likes her. I don't want to leave, but if these isafes keep popping up than this oueujme is almost inupmbrhae; until I at least gain emessxncnt in the sulner (which will at least solve a few issues).I have a history of dating younger (and not the most mature and stetbe) women; and now that I am dating someone olnur, the discrepancy in career paths is a big stmelpqr. In essence, I feel like I can't win this game we call dating.


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